To Assume Makes An Ass of U and Me

A few nights ago, I walked home from a very nice evening out with my rather drunk Chinese friend and his very sober American girlfriend. We stopped off for some Yangzhou lamb noodles on the way home. I had lambless Yangzhou lamb noodles of course. The shop was tiny, perhaps just 3 tables and little low plastic stools. I love this kind of place. Grubby, no pretense at all and usually fabulous tasty food which is the sole focus of the experience because the surroundings are so drab.

 

We ordered some food and sat chatting with the very curious staff who had lots of questions for two foreign girls. After a while,  an old man shuffled in and ordered some noodles too. He sat at the table behind me. I was showing a magazine article to one of the waiters. The elderly man asked me a few questions, very standard, where were we from? What were we doing in China? Were we used to Chinese people asking us so many questions? I admit, my answers were as standard as his questions. It was late, I was tired and I really just wanted to eat my noodles and enjoy the chopped green onions sprinkled all over them. The elderly man was no perturbed and continued to ask. And ask and ask. He asked a lot of America, so I translated the questions and answers between my American companion and the elderly man. He asked if I had been to Washington, I said I hadn't and turned back to my noodles.

 

Then, in divine English he says "I've been to Washington" and we all fell about laughing. It was such a shock! It's very common to find young people in China who speak very very good English, but rare in older people. This man was very pleased with his joke! He was a professor who specialises in thermal materials for rockets and missiles. He explained that as a child he studied at a British missionary school in Shanghai, not far from where I am staying. He glossed over what happened during the revolution, but he now lives in Beijing and had just come back to Shanghai to visit his mother. I did not ask how old she was, but figured she must be pretty ancient now.

 

His English was really beautiful to listen to with soft intonation and a gentle mixture of British and Ameican pronunciation. I wanted to ask him to read me a story!

 

He was rather disinterested in me by this point, I imagine because I'd been rather short in my answers earlier. I was humbled.

 

And reminded I should never assume.

 

But of course, I will continue to do so!